Therapist Shares Dating Tips That Are Making It Worse | The Dating Series

Comments · 409

• EL

  @ellalaaleja · 2 months ago

  "A relationship is not a reward for doing everything right" this helped me A LOT! I've been thinking that I'm not doing enough, or good enough, or that I AM not enough... thank you!

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• SA

  @SaintSabre · 3 months ago

  I think "you'll find it when you stop looking" is much better phrased as "you're more likely to find it when it's not your sole focus". look for love or that dream job, but ALSO look for friends, for networking, for hobbies, for extra skills, etc. you can look for many things but you have to put effort in to being what the thing you want also wants

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• MI

  @mikchik00 · 2 months ago

  I think the idea of needing to be perfect and ready for a relationship is the thing that trips me up.

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• CE

  @ceilingfan304 · 2 months ago

  &quot;You need to be okay with being alone&quot;<br>I&apos;ve heard this one so many times. &nbsp;I&apos;m autistic and introverted, so I&apos;m perfectly fine with being by myself. &nbsp;That doesn&apos;t mean I also don&apos;t want company.

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• SU

  @SuliMyling · 2 months ago

  I believed “if he wanted to, he would” for a long time until I discovered that I was using that as a crutch to be avoidant instead of being vulnerable enough to actually ask a man for what I wanted and needed and give him the space to try to make me happy.

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• KW

  @kweaver12 · 2 months ago

  This is gooooood! Especially the “never settle” one and why people are less likely to accept less than perfection. “Choose someone who has imperfections you can live with” is a great take, because we all have imperfections.

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• TI

  @tiyasachowdhury8437 · 3 months ago

  &quot;Sometimes relational wounds need relational care &quot; Steph, you should write a book, I need this in writing

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• KH

  @kholekamdakane3089 · 3 months ago

  “you’ll find love when you stop looking” upsets me the most! 😂. I literally stop listening when I hear that! 😩<br>Thank you for sharing this refreshing perspective. I enjoy every video of yours that I’ve watched. Thanks for the wonderful work that you do 💚

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• ST

  @startthedate · 2 months ago

  One piece of advice I&apos;d retire is &quot;trust the spark.&quot; Excitement can come from chemistry, but it can also come from anxiety or unpredictability. Consistency isn&apos;t always boring—sometimes it&apos;s the healthiest thing you&apos;ll ever experience.

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• MI

  @mimuru6409 · 2 months ago

  As someone who doesn&apos;t like texting all day I finally felt heard. Sometimes it feels like to be in a relationship you have to follow rigid dating rules that are inauthentic to who you are as a person.

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• AM

  @amari4620 · 3 months ago (edited)

  HEALING IS ONGOING!❤ Saying you need to “fully heal “before find love is some of the worse advice I’ve heard. Speaking as a person with chronic mental illnesses it’s essentially saying people like me do not deserve happy heathy relationships because we deal with a lifelong struggle. Yes, you should consistently work on mental with professionals to improve your situation but it doesn’t mean you can’t find anyone who understands. Once you know they aren’t responsible for your healing it’s ok to have someone who supports your healing journey. When someone asks for financial support from a partner it’s ok but mental or emotional support seems to never be ok.

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• TO

  @Tobinator411 · 2 months ago

  Similar to the &quot;you&apos;ll find love when you stop looking,&quot; I get frustrated when my friends/family say things like, &quot;why can&apos;t you be satisfied being single?&quot; Or &quot;Just focus on your friends and hobbies and stop trying to date.&quot; Especially when the people making those comments are all married! Yes, I&apos;m not devoting all my time to dating and building a life on my own, but I really want a long-term, amazing partner, and I don&apos;t see what&apos;s wrong with that.

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