Teachers, what was the best smart a*s response you've heard from a student?

Comments · 204

• GE

  @Gestrid · 1 year ago

  A high school mythology class teacher named &quot;Mr. D.&quot;<br><br>Hmm...<br><br>Must&apos;ve taken Chiron&apos;s place for some reason.

  21

• RH

  @rhorybader4054 · 1 year ago

  my marine biology teacher in high school <b>absolutely hated</b> me and the school stoner. &nbsp;His class was our naptime and when there was a test or something we&apos;d both just wake up, completely ace his tests, and then go back to sleep. &nbsp;I remember one time handing back in my test with stoner boy and he stared at our tests and actually went &quot;mother <b>fuckers</b> &quot; before sighing and moving on with the teaching. &nbsp;We were his best students.

  16

• EX

  @ExSharkV · 1 year ago

  I took an American Political science class in college and one day the professor got on the subject of what residents of the different US states are called (for example Floridian, New Yorker, Mainer, Rhode Islander and so on) and at one point she asked &quot;What are people from Massachusetts called? Like I know people from the Boston area are called Bostonians, but what are Massachusetts residents who aren&apos;t from the Boston area called?&quot; And this super quiet guy in the back of the class responded with &quot;Massholes&quot; the professor laughed her way through a &quot;Besides that!&quot;

  13

• CA

  @catbatrat1760 · 1 year ago (edited)

  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLOYPVLE-Yw&amp;t=501">8:21</a> Took me a few re-listens to realize he said &quot;They haven&apos;t got any, sir&quot; rather than &quot;They haven&apos;t got me, sir&quot;.<br><br>Also, I agree with Green. I mean, it makes sense; a HUGE part of comedy is subversion of expectations.

  24

• WH

  @whyareallmynamestaken1382 · 1 year ago

  &quot;botch look, im from effing spain&quot; <b>said in a terrible russian accent</b>

  77

• WR

  @writingisfun9842 · 1 year ago

  I think my favorite story here is with the jock and nerd, then the teacher saying, “he saw yours.”

  26

• LA

  @LazyBunnyKiera · 1 year ago

  &quot;It&apos;s a flavor explosion!&quot; That got me so good. I nearly did a spit-take.

  61

• RP

  @rpgqueen8737 · 1 year ago

  During my military career i took a class to further said career at my CO&apos;s instructions. Instructor of class was same rank as me and for some reason liked to pick on me. Towards the end of the course a classmate announced they would be hosting a barbecue at their home and we were all invited. Instructor piped up and said &quot;You mean anyone who&apos;s not a LOSER is invited!&quot; and looked me dead in the eye. I stared back for a moment, blank faced as if I didn&apos;t know what he was talking about, then looked over both shoulders as if I was trying to see if someone was standing behind me that he may have been referring to instead. His grin got bigger at my realization of no one being behind me. My moment came to respond with &quot;Do I look like a fucking mirror to you?&quot; The class lost it and the instructor was even pretty chill, nodding at my witty retort, acknowledging it was a good come back. One of the few cool moments I&apos;ve had in my life

  9

• SN

  @SnaileyT · 1 year ago

  In middle school me and my sister had this substitute we all called &quot;Military Mary&quot; She was an ex marine who acted like her students were in boot camp. So one day she calls my sister and a friend out in the hall. She asks them why have they been going to the bathroom so much and from what my sister said she was about ready to call home already. So my sister says the her and her friend were on their period and they were at that time. Military Mary still mad but then my sister says and I quote &quot;Are you mad at us because you don&apos;t get yours anymore?&quot; Military Mary was livid and called home, my mom was obviously mad that Mary had called for a stupid reason and just told us to ignore Mary. My sister never got in trouble. Still one of my favorite moments of middle school lol.

  63

• EM

  @em7626 · 1 year ago

  i didn’t hear this one, it was mine. i also wanna preface that in the moment i didn’t mean for it to be a smart ass response. <br><br>so this one time in math in hs we were doing a warm up on the computer and when writing or drawing stuff out, we could choose whatever color we wanted. anyway, i believe i chose light blue on a white background cuz that’s what i felt like that day. the assistant teacher in the room comes up behind me and tells me that i shouldn’t use that color because he couldn’t read it. i dismissed it telling him that it was fine because i could read it. he walks away. a couple minutes later &nbsp;he comes up behind me again, looks at my screen and tells me<br>it’s wrong. i then say, “i thought you couldn’t read it.” boy was he annoyed after that 😂

  42

• AN

  @AndrewBurnside-e3n · 1 year ago

  The I&apos;m surrounded by idiots button killed me and when they gave him the button and bag of lollipops it was gold

  31

• LO

  @lorisewsstuff1607 · 1 year ago

  Our high school had some highly successful sports teams, especially American football. All funding received by the school went into sports programs, equipment, and maintenance to the stadium. Meanwhile, the school&apos;s roof leaked like a sieve. The school was trying to get special accreditation and more funding for sports. Inspectors were coming from the state for an evaluation. <br><br>The morning they were due to arrive, hired contractors were replacing all the damaged and missing ceiling tiles and the janitors were mopping up all the water from the previous nights thunderstorm. They missed cleaning up the desk where my friend usually sat. There were no other chairs left so so my friend was leaning against the wall next to his desk. The principal walked in with one of the Inspectors and told him to sit down. &quot;But...&quot;<br><br>&quot;SIT DOWN NOW!&quot; My friend tipped his desk over, dumped a couple gallons of water on the floor, sat down on his wet chair, took out his book, and got ready for class. The inspector looked at the principal and pointed at the water. &quot;What is that?&quot;<br><br>Another student chimed in, &quot;That&apos;s just what happens every time it rains.&quot; <br><br>Our school did not get a boost in accreditation, but we did finally get a new roof.

  7