How to Build a Love That Lasts | John & Julie Gottman

Comments · 29

• SA

  @SandyCove143 · 1 month ago

  Don’t you just love how John is always nodding his head and agreeing with Jane when she’s speaking. Clearly they practice what they preach & eat their own dog food…. and it works!  XO

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• TH

  @thefunkybeat79 · 1 month ago

  Gottmans! Love your stuff! <br>Pro tip from a pro audio guy:<br>The way you&apos;re recording your audio in this video is causing John&apos;s voice to only play in the left speaker and Julies voice to only play in the right. (This will only be obvious on headphones or speakers and will not be immediately obvious on cell phone or laptop speakers.) You&apos;ll need to look for panning options when you edit to pan your voices to center or look for a &quot;sum to mono&quot; option. Here at the gym with my earbuds in it&apos;s weird to hear John over my left shoulder and Julie over my right. You could call that a creative choice, but for those with only one earbud in, they would only hear one of you.

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• EN

  @engineerDavison · 1 month ago

  My wife left me and my son, and I’ve been caring for him on my own for the past five years. It hasn’t always been easy, and sometimes it can feel lonely carrying all those memories and experiences together. I created this channel to document our journey, so that one day when my son grows up, he can look back and see how far we’ve come together. I love you with everything in me, son, and I’ll always be grateful for every moment we’ve shared.

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• SH

  @ShannoninOregon · 1 month ago (edited)

  That Aftermath process is the real payoff for most couples I see in OR &amp; CA. You&apos;ve wrapped so much important communication in each step that every couple over several decades tells me theyve never felt as good talking about what went wrong before. In fact last few years nearly all coming in for counseling lean avoidant so just not having a process at all. I&apos;ve added a synopsis page for them to remember their partner&apos;s shared vulnerability in a couple words, and the steps both made plans to do at the end. I find it sticks better when they summarize it at end. Thanks so much for the tools and understanding to get my own happily ever after too-31 years till my soulmate&apos;s death last year.❤❤❤

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• LE

  @LenaL146 · 1 month ago

  I just love how real and relatable you two are. &nbsp;You don’t talk jargon, which I am sure you could after years of academic research. &nbsp;Thank you for explaining things so well ❤

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• EN

  @engineerDavison · 1 month ago

  I believe real love is still possible when two people are honest, intentional, and willing to build something meaningful together. I’m here with a genuine heart, looking for a serious relationship—not games or something temporary. I want a connection built on trust, respect, communication, and genuine affection. ❤️

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• TW

  @Twenty8seven · 1 month ago

  This is all well and good but when you do the things in the way you describe and your partner doesn’t then what do you do? Time to walk away? A video on that would be great

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• US

  @user-vi6ro8bd4l · 1 month ago (edited)

  Always, always consider biological factors first. There very well may be undiagnosed ADHD, autism spectrum, cPTSD, BPD, ACE score, medication side effects, hormonal imbalance, any combination of these, and more. Whether or not it&apos;s chronic or recent, think biology first.

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• MA

  @Marann771 · 1 month ago

  I would call it chemistry: the chemistry is gone even if love may still be there. When it gets to that point it is because a person&apos;s true nature has been experienced so why would one think that person would change now?

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• CA

  @Carolina922 · 1 month ago (edited)

  Can you please do an episode on how to have a happy, lasting marriage when one partner is disabled or has chronic mental illness?

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• EP

  @EpartnersMarketing · 3 weeks ago

  It&apos;s not fair for my husband to dump all his stress on me and not listen to me at all. So I just got fed up and started tuning him out. It&apos;s entitled.

• RR

  @RR-js9kl · 2 weeks ago (edited)

  How do you deal with a partner that you do not really have due to substance abuse.<br>He does not like to talk, he does not like to go out or on vacations, he has mood swings, he is unmotivated, &nbsp;he procrastinates and does nothing all day. No interest is how this all makes me feel.<br>In the meantime I am doing it most of the work including contribute more financially.........I do not like to live in a dirty home with unpaid bills piling up....

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