What to Do When Your Spouse Has A.D.H.D.

Comments · 299

• CA

  @canderscc1129 · 5 years ago

  PLEASE DO MORE ON ADULT ADHD!!

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• CA

  @Cathy-xi8cb · 5 years ago

  Complex PTSD with someone with ADHD?  What a mess!!!  The person with C- PTSD easily feels harmed, ignored, let down, and abandoned, and the person with ADHD struggles to show up with the responsibilities, help out w/o being asked or assisted, forgets and minimizes what needs to be done.  DR. D:  YOU DROPPED THE BALL  on what this woman is dealing with inside HERSELF w/ C-PTSD.  The reason he keeps saying " fix it" is that ADHD is a problem.  He should be saying manage, because this is a problem without a fix, it requires constant management.

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• CA

  @CaptPicard81 · 5 years ago

  As an adult with ADD I'd love for the Dr to take more calls like this

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• AL

  @alittlepieceofearth · 6 years ago

  "It is a context not an excuse." Yes. I get lost in time. I am so focused in what is going on right in front of me that I forget that I'm on a time limit.

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• TH

  @thinlaydolma2568 · 6 years ago

  I like how she is dealing with this issue now then later.

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• BE

  @bellareina05 · 5 years ago

  It feels like swimming against a current through a maze saving someone who is drowning who is at the same time they trying to pull you under. Emotionally exhausting and physically exhausting. This is so under discussed

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• JO

  @johnbushra9769 · 5 years ago

  As much I love and respect Dr mate , also I understand how much the environment and trauma can effect us , but from my experience medication is a necessity and changed my life , although it's not the only thing that I need but it's fundamental . I believe ADHD is mainly genetic neurological disorder that the environment could also effect to a certain extent

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• RY

  @ryankelly1 · 5 years ago

  ADHD is a medically related pathology.<br>Despite there still being unknown variables that contribute to ADHD, research does STRONGLY indicate there’s a malfunction in the molecular pathways that occur physiologically.<br>YES, a development of behavioral and cognitive skills is necessary to learn and incorporate in ones life in order to alleviate the medically related symptoms of adhd as well as alleviate the lifestyle consequences that occur if adhd is severely uncontrolled

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• LU

  @luisgabrielortiz2008 · 4 years ago

  I’ve literally struggled with everything that was just said in this video. Being married with someone who is ADHD, I can attest to how true this is. Wow, thank you SO much for this.

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• JO

  @jongolden2223 · 6 years ago

  Please do more on adhd!!!

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• GE

  @geofferypmeyers · 6 years ago

  My mom raised 6 kids with undiagnosed ADHD. It was... interesting to say the least. I’m 30 and I still wish she would get treatment.

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• PE

  @peonypetal5405 · 4 years ago

  I appreciate the suggestion of healing ADHD through affection, and I would love to be able to have the talk this girl practices in this video, but I&apos;m so afraid my husband is beyond this. He&apos;s in complete denial. He makes us late for everything. In the rare instance we can actually get in the car in time to leave and just barely get somewhere on time, he bolts back into the house for like 5 minutes for something totally unimportant. He loses items every day. We&apos;re lucky if it&apos;s only one item a day. He spills/drops things and doesn&apos;t notice, and even when I point them out, he forgets to clean them. If I try to talk to him about something serious, he asks me if he can go do something &quot;really quick.&quot; That can be up to two hours. If I try to just share something about my day that isn&apos;t that important, it&apos;s like we&apos;re having two different conversations where I&apos;m trying to tell my story and he&apos;s telling unrelated jokes to me in between my sentences. We&apos;ve had several cutoff notices for gas and electricy (and he still insists on being in charge of those bills). He constantly mishears me and frequently interprets the complete opposite of what I just said. (His mom does this too, and it completely baffles me.) He &quot;loses time&quot; as my mom describes it, where he&apos;ll go to run an errand at a nearby shop and just be gone for three hours for no reason and does not believe the timing, even if you show him proof like text message time stamps. <br><br>But the worst part is that he actually a great person who I love very much, but he refuses to acknowledge these issues. He has an excuse for everything. If I try to bring them up calmly, he&apos;s got a reason each one was out of his control. If I bring them up as a pattern, he accuses me of hating him. I&apos;m so exhausted. I can&apos;t talk about it with anyone in my life anymore, because they&apos;ve &nbsp;noticed some of the things independently, and if they make a comment, he accuses me of talking behind his back so they&apos;ll mock him. I feel like the only thing I can do to get any small amount of peace in my life is pretend to be okay and just try to handle everything myself while constantly worrying about the things he tries to take responsibility for and working my high-demand job. I look at piles of laundry and stress about how I&apos;m going to do it all on top of everything else, but if he tries to help, I&apos;m even more stressed because I know there&apos;s a 90% chance he&apos;s going to forget and leave the clothes in the washer and they&apos;ll get moldy and I&apos;ll have to redo them while he argues with me because he swears he just put them in the wash and denies the obvious fact that they smell like mildew. <br><br>And I feel terrible because he really does try. I aked him to get me medicine because I&apos;m sick. The pharmacy is 10 minutes away. He came back 2 hours later with a sweet card, a whole bunch of items we didn&apos;t need, some items to replace items that have been lost, and three medications, none of which I asked for and one even specifically saying on the box that it does not have the ingredient I asked for. He said I wasn&apos;t specific enough. I said, &quot;I need pseudoephedrine, which is in Sudafed.&quot; There is no earthly way I can possibly be more specific. We have a shared notes app that we use as a shopping list, but the chances of him actually looking at it are iffy. I would love to appreciate his sweet card, but I&apos;m still sick and wondering how I&apos;m going to find a place for these items and try to make sure they don&apos;t get lost and trying to get my work done and get prepared for a social event this weekend, which at this point, I don&apos;t even want to attend. <br><br>What I don&apos;t understand is how we got here. I have &quot;mild OCD&quot; according to the psychiatrist I saw to get help with my issues, and I&apos;m usually pretty organized. I&apos;ve never lost a phone, keys, wallet, purse. I always used to be able to find a charger when I needed one. When we first started dating and even when we got engaged, things weren&apos;t this bad. It seems like everything really blew up a few months before our wedding. It &nbsp;makes me wonder if something about me triggered something in his ADHD to get worse. I would love to discuss this with a counselor, but I don&apos;t think he&apos;s even open to admitting he has ADHD, even though he&apos;s a strong &quot;yes&quot; for every single attribute. I don&apos;t see how we can continue like this and ever be able to have any semblance of what I would consider a normal life.<br><br>So kudos if you&apos;ve made it through all this. I&apos;m writing it partly to vent, partly to throw it out there in case anyone can help in any small way with any suggestion, or at least maybe just to make someone else feel better because they can relate. I really feel for everyone on both sides of this and I wish there was just an easy solution like a vitamin.

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