Talking about Trauma won't heal you

Comments · 908

• TH

  @TherapyinaNutshell · 1 year ago · pinned

  Improve your mental health with the free course, <a href="https://courses.therapyinanutshell.com/grounding-skills-for-anxiety-stress-and-ptsd">https://courses.therapyinanutshell.com/grounding-skills-for-anxiety-stress-and-ptsd</a>

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• DE

  @Demon-pb5jm · 1 year ago

  Here’s the counterargument: Maladaptive Daydreaming. Choosing to live in the fantasy life instead of your traumatic one. I have struggled with this for years. I spend more time in the fantasy then reality

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• ZO

  @zoetjez · 1 year ago

  Talk therapy didn&apos;t help me. Trauma therapy did. But a very important part in healing for me was talking about some parts of my trauma and people close to me believing me and supporting me. I think it&apos;s very important for someone who goes through (c)ptsd or something like that, to feel seen. Feeling seen and less alone was a very important step. The only way to do that is to open up emotionally. It&apos;s also something that really helps when you are depressed. The most important part is the way the person you talk to reacts. I was very lucky to have met my boyfriend when I wasn&apos;t doing mentally well. He listened to me without judgement, without dismissing me or making my problems smaller. I don&apos;t have CPTSD anymore and he and his family made healing easier.

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• GI

  @gigiLucy1970 · 1 year ago

  I&apos;ve just completed EMDR. It&apos;s really helped me. I&apos;m 55 And tried everything for cptsd. <br>I am loved i am at peace

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• MA

  @massivematt3113 · 1 year ago (edited)

  Recently I had a huge win. My biggest ick is trusting people. It’s just so hard. I’ve been building a friendship with someone I admire. We’ve both been vulnerable about what we’ve been through, so there’s a real solid foundation, and we went 9 days without talking. I told myself I would text them in a couple days (7 days at that point). The 2 days building up was separating my stories and anxieties stories. My story was that she would text back and want to meet up, anxieties was that she would never respond and hates me. I got to the point of understanding that both stories can exist, but Anxiety’s stems from trauma, mine from reality. I tried my hardest to believe and I texted her. She not only replied but was excited to meet up. I’m so proud of myself. Very hard, but that doesn’t mean I can’t do it.

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• MR

  @MrFortuneCookie7 · 1 year ago

  &quot;I am worthless. I&apos;ll never find true love.<br><br>--&gt; I am TOTALLY loveable. I deserve to be treated with respect and love. Someone out there is going to show me this love, and I won&apos;t settle for less.&quot;

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• MD

  @MDnisarul-z7u · 1 year ago

  To anyone who&apos;s suffering depression, anxiety, insomnia and other mental health problems, you are not alone. I feel you. You are so brave. You are doing so well. I&apos;m proud of you. I&apos;m sending you a virtual hug ❤ For me, it wasn’t therapy or meds that helped the most — it was reconnecting with myself. I started using the exercises in Shift Your Mind by Alexander Brooks, and it made me feel human again. The anxiety that used to control my whole day barely shows up now! 🙏❤

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• JC

  @jchiappardi891 · 1 year ago

  I’m suffering through prolonged grief and it’s totally ruined who I used to be. &nbsp;I hope this helps even a little

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• MI

  @miki7899 · 11 months ago

  Im a 55 year old man that still deals with being raped by a neighbor and his partner from 12-14. I&apos;ve tried everything including CBT, EMDR, &nbsp;and talk therapy. &nbsp;I&apos;ve tried &quot; meeting&quot; my younger self with bringing childhood pics to therapy with me and talking to him, (my inner child), and telling him it wasn&apos;t his fault, he will get better as he grows up, and he was not a horrible kid that deserved what happened to me. NONE of this worked for me with several different therapists over about 10 years. But I do believe that the more you talk about your trauma, you no longer suffer in shame, &nbsp;embarrassment, &nbsp;and guilt as much because its out in the light and a good therapist can help you get the negative thoughts and feelings changed over time. I guess everyone is different &nbsp;but I believe talking about it, especially if you have the courage to talk to a group to help others dealing with this trauma or preventing this happening to other kids, is soooo healing!!!

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• MA

  @martinepeters9891 · 1 year ago

  I&apos;m totally happy with being single and focusing on my career and my cats.

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• AL

  @alaine_wilworth · 1 year ago

  This is exactly what I experienced in counseling. I told that to the counselor and asked how this is supposed to help and she was not really able to provide any answer.

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• RE

  @Rentheworld · 1 year ago

  TLDR: Healing is unique. She is right. But sometimes you might NEED to talk about it over and over - for yourself. That’s okay too. YOU are in control and in charge or your healing. Your therapist is your copilot. That doesn’t mean you don’t listen to them or don’t value what they say. It just means you’re a team and together you can figure out why you need to talk about it. <br>Also, just want to share - I have PTSD and I find that, now that I can, I really NEED to go over it again and again. I find that I really need to feel the feelings from the trauma that I pushed away. I KNOW how it’s affecting me in the present day now (although I’m still learning fun new ways that it is) but I NEED to understand what happened, what I felt, what other parties felt. I told my therapist the other day that I feel like I’ve spent a long time trying to fit a narrative to my situation that only made sense if I was the one in the wrong in a situation that no one is ever at fault it. NOW, however, I need to figure out what I believe, not what something/someone is telling me what I SHOULD believe. I know I may never know the FULL truth. But I need A truth. <br><br>I fully agree that just going over trauma again and again can create further harm in different situations. But, for me, it’s a need right now. A need to understand. A need for my story to be told, to be heard. To be believed. And it SUCKS, man. Every time I tell it, or a piece of it, it feels like another piece of me shatters. Short term, it is the most awful thing. Long term, I can finally see that I’m healing. <br><br>Long story short, it’s individual. Trauma, unfortunately if you’re trying to research it, individual. You don’t have to talk about it. You don’t have to NOT talk about it. You may have to go through a few therapists. And I know that sucks and it’s scary. But find someone who meets you where you are (and recognize that just because someone didn’t, that doesn’t mean they’re a bad person or therapist, they just weren’t a good fit for you). YOU get to control your healing. And your therapist will be your guide. Listen to them, they know you and they know your situation. <br><br>And, remember, there are lots of parts to trauma therapy. For me, I had to ease into it. I couldn’t admit it or talk about it. But I knew I wanted (needed?) to start. So I started asking my therapist pointed questions. Eventually, I emailed him a vague and apologetic email starting to explain what happened. It took several months before I could say any of it out loud. And then we started a timeline of what happened - a form of exposure therapy - and it was God awful. But necessary for me (focus on FOR ME). I can talk about it now and start to challenge negative self talk and try to forgive. I can try to start sharing what happened to me in safe ways in the hopes that maybe it resonates with someone. In the future, maybe we’ll do what she’s outlining. There are many aspects, many paths to walk, and that’s okay. <br><br>If you’ve read this whole thing, thank you. I hope it gave you something to think about for yourself, for someone you love, or for someone you may meet in the future. But thank you for taking your time to read a stranger’s story.

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