Why "Just Leave Him" Never Works For The Other Woman

Should I stay or should I leave? If you're the other woman, that question doesn't quit. My guest this week, Toronto relationship coach Francesca Zoia, works with women living inside that exact loop, and this conversation lands right on the heels of what I've been talking about the last few weeks: the version of the relationship that only exists in your head. We cover what it really means to be in love with a married man who keeps promising and never choosing, why "just leave him" is the worst advice you can give a woman in an affair, and the one question I ask clients that tells them everything. Francesca shares her own 14-year relationship, nine of them long distance, and how long it took her to stop waiting by the phone. I get into how I finally knew I was done, and the trip that taught me to be available to myself first. No verdict, no "here's what you should do." Just the conversation you actually need to have with yourself. 00:00 Why this conversation ties the last few weeks together 02:02 Should I stay or should I go, as the other woman 05:37 Looking at the relationship for what it is, not what you hope it becomes 06:41 The bar question I ask my clients 09:07 The stories we make up to keep hoping 13:41 Grieving a life that only existed in your head 15:02 Why his actions matter more than his words 20:13 Does he love you, or how you make him feel 26:43 Why "just leave him" never helps 32:19 How I knew I'd outgrown it 36:02 Francesca on nine years of long distance 41:22 Micro boundaries and being available to yourself 46:25 Why knowing your worth isn't arrogance 50:46 Closing the loop by not answering the question Guest Info. 🌐 https://lovewithfrancesca.com/ ❤️‍🔥 About The Scarlet Edit The other woman's perspective on affairs, infidelity, and divorce — told without shame or judgment. I'm Nikki Corbett, host of The Scarlet Edit. Every Thursday I share honest conversations about midlife relationships, affairs, shame, heartbreak, desire, and what it really takes to start over. Whether you're navigating an affair, healing from divorce, or trying to understand the version of yourself that's emerging on the other side — this is where you'll find perspective and community for the things you've carried alone. 🔔 Subscribe for new episodes every Thursday! @thescarletedit 🌐 Website: https://www.thescarletedit.com ❤️‍🔥 Connect with The Scarlet Edit Instagram: Instagram: thescarlet.edit Threads: https://www.threads.com/@thescarlet.edit YouTube: @thescarletedit For Collaboration and Business inquiries: 💌 Email: [email protected] ⚠️ Disclaimer: I do not accept any liability for any loss or damage incurred from you acting or not acting as a result of watching any of my publications. You acknowledge that you use the information I provide at your own risk. © The Scarlet Edit #thescarletedit #infidelity #otherwoman #divorce #affairs #datingafterdivorce #relationships