5 Signs it's a Trauma Bond, not Love

Comments · 3K

• RY

  @rynetreatch9558 · 1 year ago

  I swear this dude knows every detail of me without even knowing I exist.

  480

• VA

  @vanessac1965 · 1 year ago

  One of the most confusing things is when the person has good qualities, can be empathetic and caring, and expresses love from time to time. That can make us think they'll turn a corner and things could become good...if we could just stop angering them or they could treat us better. Don't waste your precious time.

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• HM

  @HM-ec5vi · 1 year ago

  When you feel addicted to them but also feel alone is a good sign of a trauma bond. A healthy relationship doesn’t make you feel alone and desperate for their presence.

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• KE

  @keiko8308 · 1 year ago

  “They didnt go through the pain with you. They caused the pain” <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSgkPM5YkPs&amp;t=390">6:30</a>

  385

• JE

  @JenBreaksTheSilence · 1 year ago

  &quot;They can be respectful when it benefits them.&quot; I&apos;m repeating this in my head over and over.

  660

• AB

  @abeagleslife · 1 year ago

  &quot;They&quot; wanted the relationship to work as long as I was the one doing the work and the changing.

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• PA

  @paigeconant5764 · 1 year ago

  “It’s not your job to teach someone how to be a mature, healthy adult.” <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSgkPM5YkPs&amp;t=904">15:04</a>

  705

• WI

  @WindDriedMoss · 1 year ago

  &quot;You didn&apos;t have a problem with it before!&quot;<br>&quot;No, I did have a problem with it, I just didn&apos;t feel safe enough to bring it up.&quot;

  605

• LE

  @leehamilton4459 · 2 months ago

  Everything is hunky dory fine....until you disagree with them, or confront them with their behavior, or make them reflect on how they are treating you, then watch out!

  84

• MI

  @MissEmbersong · 1 year ago

  The confusion when their treatment of you is chronic neglect rather than any aggression, violence etc is so mindbreaking. My ex never treated me violently or aggressively, but he kept promising things and never delivering. He&apos;d say he understood my needs and then do nothing to provide for said needs. Everything he did was a non-action and so I could never pin-point why I felt so shit. Why I ended up exploding or crying hysterically because he hadn&apos;t DONE anything. Now that we&apos;re broken up he points to all of my mistakes and ways of coping as reasons as to why he&apos;s &quot;had to&quot; cut me out of his life. Like I&apos;m the only one to blame, THE problem. Because he&apos;s done nothing wrong...

  105

• TU

  @TuulaTurto-b3l · 1 year ago

  &quot;I don&apos;t &nbsp;care if they had rough childhood. &nbsp;We all had rough childhoods, but we can&apos;t let our past trauma control us.&quot; I felt that keenly.

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• TH

  @TheShavedleggs · 1 year ago

  1. You take all the responsibility for the relationship and always try to fix things, while your partner shows no self-reflection or accountability. <br>2. Your self-esteem and self-perception are destroyed by constant gaslighting, blame, and devaluation. <br>3. You carry all the responsibility for the relationship and find yourself justifying your partner’s behavior to others. <br>4. There is a clear double standard: you would never treat your partner the way they treat you. <br>5. It feels impossible to leave the relationship, even though staying is damaging you (you feel addicted to the highs and lows).

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