POV: Admiring him from a far with Filipino songs | AMFilms

Comments · 480

• IT

  @itsamfilms · 3 years ago · pinned

  My comments section is a safe space for you to pour out your heart, whether you're nursing a heartbreak or feeling nervous about confessing your feelings to your crush. You can share your emotions without hesitation here. It's a welcoming place where you can find comfort, advice, and a sense of togetherness from others who've been through the same whirlwind of emotions. ❤

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• US

  @user-ky3op3jc1r · 2 years ago

  &quot;l choose to adore you from a distance…<br>for distance will shield me from pain.&quot;

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• OI

  @Oizyszz · 3 years ago

  not me trying to make myself feel better by listening to this playlist

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• DE

  @delusionsoftheruinedworld3257 · 2 years ago

  I can barely admire him from afar (we both go to different schools, and live in different towns). I can only meet him in provincial/division level competitions, and even then I know that I have no chance of being with him. He is like the light in my monotone life, as cliche as it sounds. He drives me to become a better version of myself, serves as a challenge and as an inspiration for me to cease my laziness and finally return to how I was in the past. <br><br>I struggled and still continue to struggle with imposter syndrome, especially with how my parents love to compare me with others. &quot;Yun ang totoong matalino (That&apos;s a real intelligent person)&quot; they often said, and though I know that they probably didn&apos;t mean to hurt me, it still stung, and it continued to haunt me to the point where I no longer wanted to do well in my academics since nothing would ever be enough for them. So I&apos;ve spent the past three years of my JHS life half-heartedly learning, and by some miracle, still managed to pass, achieve honors, and join extracurricular academic events. It was where I found him, a kindred soul. Both of us were introverts, the top students of our class, and are mostly the quiet type (though my silence stems from my lack of self-confidence). &nbsp;I barely paid any attention to him at our first competition, aside from the fact that he bagged the first place in his event, but then I started to meet him more often, and it just developed, until I finally realized that I felt like this for him. That research seminar was both a blessing and a curse, because it helped me come in terms with my feelings for him, but it also brought the realization that this, whatever this is, was doomed from the start. <br><br>I mean, he is everything I ever wanted. He is intelligent, good-looking, soft-spoken, financially stable (upper middle class) and a reader (I&apos;ve always wanted someone to talk about books with). But am I what he&apos;s looking for? No. I am neither beautiful nor am I that intelligent. I am not the first choice for an ideal partner, and I accept this with a heavy heart. &nbsp;This, however, doesn&apos;t mean that I&apos;m not free to admire him. Even when it hurts at times I have made peace with this, and it actually feels good to finally have a goal in life (I want to beat him, I want him to look at me as an equal, even for just a few seconds). I want to continue competing with him, I want to be recognized as his rival, I want so many things but I won&apos;t be delusional, even this is already toeing the line of being too much. <br><br>To my beloved ******, I hope that there will come a day where I can finally stand in front of you and tell you everything I&apos;ve held deep in my heart. It may not be today, nor tomorrow, nor any day in the future, but I am proud to say that meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me. I am ever grateful to whatever or whoever helped me join those events, because it became my haven, and is now something that serves as my reason to keep on improving myself as a person whenever I wake up in the morning.

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• NA

  @NaoruZo_Xx · 2 years ago

  Please stop giving me mixed signals i dont &nbsp;know if you like me or not!!

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• MA

  @marilynchua3566 · 2 years ago

  i have this girl (im a girl too btw) that approached me since the day of first sem. she was interested sakin and she was so obvious with it its so cute. we eventually clicked and started forming a bond. at first it was great, i was happy, she was happy and our rs was jst going with the flow. she doesn&apos;t want to commit and i was ok with any rs with us so we eventually settled with &quot;situationship&quot;. pinagyabang ko sya sa md, repost, sp, and even sa main acc ko. some of the pics are faceless of her or the both of us para kunwari lowkey eme. i always make sure na I give her all the five love languages cuz she deserved it and more. 2 and a half deep into that situationship, there begun the downfall. simula pa lang, she doesn&apos;t know what kind of rs she wants with me and she doesn&apos;t see any future of us. i never pressured her into figuring it all out at once cuz ik how it feels to be confuse. i waited for her answer kahit wala akong pinanghahawakang salita nya and then the signs became obvious. she was losing interest sakin and ako na toh ngayong naghahabol. i wanted this, and this is my karma. so ayun we slowly lessen talking w each other until weeks and months na. it hurts cuz even sa school we can see each other and we both know the awkwardness was absolute sht. we never had a proper closure. so now, we&apos;re so close yet so far away. ill always admire her and crave everything abt her but jst her presence kills me. if u ever see this (i doubt ull see it cuz sa spotify ka nakikinig) jst remember, I&apos;ll always be waiting, pat. u might see this in a few days, weeks, months, or even years. but know i can never actually graduate from u. i wish we could properly talk pat:(

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• AN

  @anita8234 · 2 years ago

  A few years ago, I met him and we even became friends. During our staycation at my uncle&apos;s, we got close and eventually bonded. We were kids, so I never felt anything. All I knew was he was a friend of mine, and all we wanted to do was play.<br><br>Eventually, we drifted ways and didn&apos;t see eachother for a few years. I tried to message him, but he never responded. <br><br>In 2022, we went to a beach for my dad&apos;s reunion with his highschool friends. He was there.<br>I don&apos;t know what it was, but my eyes were glued to him. I wanted to talk to him, but I couldn&apos;t. Every time I stared at him and he was about to stare back, I would look somewhere else, avoiding his gaze. I was really intimidated by him.<br><br>I subconsciously memorised his physical traits just from looking at him. <br><br>When we got home, I couldn&apos;t help but think about him. I don&apos;t know why, but I ended up developing some kind of crush for him. I really admired his physical features.<br>Once I realised I liked him, I kept talking about him to my friends. It didn&apos;t help that I kept feeding my delusions, thinking about how it would be if I had a chance with him.<br><br>Now, I think my feelings for him are slowly disappearing. I&apos;m not sure if my feelings were actually genuine, or if I was just bored.<br>It always feels like I&apos;m tricking myself whenever I realise that I admire someone. Whenever I admire someone, I end up feeding my delusions, making my feelings stronger.<br><br>I&apos;m afraid of confessing to anyone. What if I assume that I like someone, then they like me back, then I realise that I never actually liked them? I&apos;m afraid of hurting someone because of my own boredome and curiosity. <br><br>Although I have absolutely no plans of getting into a relationship, I feel somewhat empty.<br>I feel different, whenever I see my friends who are even younger than me, happily admiring people. I feel left out whenever my friends tell me someone confessed to them, and they like them back. <br><br>Whenever a guy calls me pretty, or just compliments me, I assume things. Whenever a guy gives me a single ounce of attention, I can&apos;t help but think about how he feels about me.<br>It&apos;s frustrating to feel like this, but it&apos;s unavoidable.

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• BE

  @beatricemargauxx · 2 years ago (edited)

  so there&apos;s a guy in my class i hate. this is a long story. if u don&apos;t have time, don&apos;t read. edi wow. <br><br>he&apos;s 6&apos;2&quot;, pretty good-looking (yoon keeho + donny pangilinan = him), and really smart. this guy&apos;s been my classmate since grade 1 and we barely interacted until grade 6 when our class was halved for a play. i was the leader for group 1, he was for group 2. the play made up 50% of our grade and the better group were to receive 10 plus points. it started when our groups started accusing each other of spying to spoil the play. we didn’t interact, pero we had tension. basta we just hated each other. <br> <br>we graduated grade school. grade 7, we weren&apos;t classmates, then the pandemic started and i didn’t see his annoying face for 2 years. face-to-face classes started in grade 10, and i see him in my classroom - he was my classmate. 😀 he got elected as mayor (mayor = president) while i got elected as vice mayor. i was okay. i guess. <br> <br>in our set up, the mayor and vm were required to work closely - class meetings, homeroom, officer meetings, everything! especially since we have a subject that required the commander (him) to have an assistant, aka ME! he&apos;d torture me with utos, class debates were insane, we’d have unspoken “who answers faster” competitions in math (ofc, i win all the time, DUH 🙄), basta petty shit. pero with that school year, the tension felt lighter and the bickering felt fun because we were just shitting on each other for no reason, PLS 😭😭 <br> <br>despite being menaces, we were forced to work together not just as officers but as school representatives kasi we were partners for math competitions and interschool debates. we reached regionals and nationals for math, and we surprisingly won lots of debates, too. i guess we work well ‘pag it’s us working together instead of against each other? <br> <br>to cut it short, with all the forced proximity every single day, we learned how to work together. he saw me during my worst and best, i saw him in his. i felt the genuineness of his advice and comfort, and i think he felt mine too. the school year was almost over, and we grew to be friends. not best friends tho kasi i have a chosen group of friends i eat lunch with, and he was still annoying and he was a part of the “campus crush” boys which are basically 5 guys na best friends since grade 1 who grew up all good-looking. kinda sounds cheesy, but i’ve known these boys since grade 1 and i witnessed them grow from crush lang ng girls in class into “campus crushes” na ginawang hobby ang basketball, soccer, boxing, gym, golf, and billiards. <br> <br>anyways, towards the end of grade 10, he invited me to study with him for finals at a cafe. he offered to drive me since malapit lang naman and he wanted to practice driving daw (for the record, i was 15, he was 16 - 16 is the legal age for a student license and he had his family driver in another car to follow his car, pls he’s so extra??). he stopped at like an empty park and he disappeared for a while pero he came back with a bouquet of light pink peonies???? obvi, i was confused pero kilig kasi WHAT IF?? DIBA? so yun, he gave them to me, and he basically confessed. <br> <br>i asked why he chose pink peonies and he said that i once said peonies are my favorite OUOBEOUGRBF. pink daw kasi it means romance (the confession) and luck (for the finals). SO I WAS INTERNALLY SCREAMING, BUT HE DIDN’T HAVE TO KNOW THAT. and then i told him i liked him too. seconds after i confessed, i heard screaming from somewhere. turns out, his 4 idiot friends helped him buy flowers, tapos they started panicking and shit kasi they saw 3 ipis and started running kasi “it was so scary” 😭 he looked so pissed, pero i was just laughing kasi 4 guys who were all over 5’10” were running from IPIS 😭😭 <br> <br>there, that happened. we agreed na pagiisipan ko if he can ligaw me if he does better than me or ties with me in our math test. we actually ended up studying at a cafe with his friends (kasi he needed to libre them daw for the flowers) tapos he drove me home with his friends in the back of the car (GUYS I WAS SO KILIG, HE WAS DRIVING A GREEN GMC HUMMER EV SUV, THE CAR WAS SO SEXY). ANYWAYS, i celebrated my 16th birthday through a small dinner @ china blue by jeremy leung. i only had close family members and like 10 friends + him. we had our exams a week after that and for the first time in history, he did better than me in MATH. i got 99/100 and he got 100/100????? I WAS SO??? ANYWAYS, he ate that exam up and i was soooo proud. <br><br> <br>i let him ligaw me, but it was up to my family, so i invited him to the fiesta in my mom’s province kasi he just needed my maternal family’s blessing. he went through a 1-hour drive (w/ driver) to go there, and brought whiskey for the guys, flowers for my mom and titas, tapos brought puto in that like filipino circle tray made of straw. they were all SURPRISINGLY welcoming kasi they’re usually strict. everyone said yes, pero lolo was the final boss 😭😭he started threatening him muna, pero he ended with saying that they took care of me so much and that they don’t even let langaw touch me, so he has to take care of me too and said YES IFBRUFBRURURBBROFD. TAPOS tHERE, we had fiesta, yada yada yada, and he went home na since i was having a sleepover w my cousins. I WENT TO BED SO KILIG THAT NIGHT. <br> <br>anyways, summer break, he was doing gym w his friends and busy helping in one of their businesses most of the time (para may pang date daw, PLS), and i was reading books and doing gym. we’d meet every 2-3 weeks, tapos he got his driver’s license in early july too so he was allowed to drive without a driver na YIE. the school year started, and we’re keeping it private muna, pero we soft launched each other na nung summer! rn, he’s the student council president, i’m the vice president. tapos we’re not classmates, pero i’m my section’s mayor and he didn’t run for office this year kasi he’s already president (matchy matchy student leaders??!??!?). <br><br>THERE IM SO KILIG. sasagutin ko siya maybe march 2024?? he&apos;s proven to me so many times that he deserves to be my boyfriend. from giving me his jacket in school, to comforting me during my bad days, spoon feeding me when i got sick, giving me space without me asking for it, unspoken acts of service, he learned how to cook nilaga kasi it&apos;s my favorite, he doesn&apos;t let anyone adjust the passenger seat in his car kasi it&apos;s the angle i feel comfortable in (I BLUSHED), BASTAAA HE JUST GETS ME?? he said he&apos;s willing to wait for however long, and i love him so much for that. thank you for being so patient and caring and generous and kind and annoying, Nico! i love you to the sun, back, and back again. <br> <br>lesson learned: wag tatakbo from ipis. <br> <br>sana may natutunan kayo. always remember na walang umaga sa japan dahil lahat sila ay hapon. <br> <br>IF U GOT THIS FAR, THANK U FOR READING. IT WAS LONG ASF BUT YEA. THANK U &lt;3

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• HU

  @hunnyz8887 · 2 years ago

  Listening to this while studying for my midterms tomorrow is such a mood lol <br><br>I wish everyone in this comment section luck with their feelings and crushy cakes. Can&apos;t really relate bcs arospec things but go guys!! Naniniwala ako sa inyong lahat !!!!

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• AN

  @AnthonyAnonymousGamer · 2 years ago

  Crossed paths with this guy during grade 6. Never really noticed him until my 10th grade where he got a sudden glow up of confidence. I know i started admiring him but then one day i just looked back and made eye contact with him. I felt intense butterflies in my stomach. Grabi love at first sight ko dun. Since then i have just been watching him from afar, and the more i watch the harder i crushed on him to the point i couldn&apos;t even relax when hes near and always looked for the little details about him; thinking about him day and night. <br><br>He had multiple love interests so i knew i had to stop at some point. I told myself that &quot;if you love him, let him go. If he comes back, then maybe its the right decision&quot;. After awhile, feelings faded and i thought it was merely infatuation. But then we were classmates during senior high and the feelings came back stronger than ever. Not only that, we started becoming closer friends as we were surrounded by new classmates and were only familiar with a small group of students. <br><br>I guess i was kind of confused as to why i felt so strongly about a person i dont even know that well. Its most likely limerence. But now i cant even stop thinking about him again. I tried to avoid and find someone else but i keep coming back to him. I want to tell him how i feel and show him how much he matters to me. But in every circumstance that i think of, i dont see it going well. And its not some kind of denial, its a real fact. I cant help but long for him now. Maybe at some point, he became the only light in my life. Palagi nalang umaasa na baka sakali... Sakali lang na mutual feelings kami? Di ko mapigil sarili ko sa pag-asa sa imposible. <br><br>So now i have limerence with someone that is getting closer yet so far, far. Try to push him away but cant help getting closer too. Even though i know he likes someone else, even though all the signs point to a bad decision, even though i know its wrong... Gusto ko parin siya. Gusto ko siya ng sobra, sobra. This might end me with an awful heartbreak pero kasalanan ko bang siya pinili ng puso ko? <br><br>I hope one day i learn how to move past this. And i hope he finds someone that will make him happy, even if it isnt me. But until then im going to be staying in this dilemma of crushes.

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• SH

  @shirleyfernandez5912 · 2 years ago

  Transfer student ako at di ko siya talaga napansin in the first weeks of school, kabado pa ako at nag-aadjust, one day when finally discussion and lecture came after a few days of chilling on school, nakilala ko siya by our science teacher. &quot;Kausapin niyo naman din si (name) wag niyo hayaang ma feel outcast siya&quot; she mentioned because when we&apos;re getting to know each other, he opened to our teacher about his feeling of not being belong or outcasted, dahil nga din introverted person siya. Ever since na narinig ko yun, na intrigue ako dahil finally fellow introvert (pero ako may pagkamadaldal din haha) kaya gusto ko sana siya lapitan at makipagkaibigan, nga lang di kaya ng social powers ko pa na lumapit sa kanya dahil rin nakapaligid rin sa kanya ang mga ibang mga boys para include siya sa kasiyahan so dahil nga wala pa akong close or talagang maituturing na friend nang time na yun, i just admired him from afar nagta-try kumuha ng right timing para makipag kaibigan sakanya.<br><br>First nakagrupo ko siya sa isang activity sa AP awkward pero naging masaya din ako dahil yun ang first communication naming dalawa, mahina boses niya at may pagkabingi ako whaha kaya lumalapit din ako para marinig. Ever since then mas lalong napapadalas ang pagtingin ko sakanya wheter dahil lutang ako tumitingin ako sa bintana at dun siya nakaupo sa ofc nano-notice ko rin siya or dahil di ko alam may feeling connection or need na maging connected sa kanya. Time ng TLE lesson namin napapansin ko na sa sarili ko ang pag notice ng every recitation, movement at habits niya, nawe-weirdohan ako at dahil ako ay isang tipo ng tao na madaldal at para sakin ang crushes ay short term na pang &quot;thrill&quot; lang para masa ganahan sa school eme, sinabi ko muna sa dalwang kaibigan ko and ofc, naturally inasar nila ako.<br><br>Continuing from that time na lumipat kami ng room at nagpalit ng advisers, sure na ako sa sarili ko na may pag ka crush ako sa kanya, pero ang weird kasi, hindi ko feel na &quot;dapat maging kami&quot; any infatuation na ganyan, para sakin masaya nako na makikita ko siya pagpasok sa school at paguwi, minsan pag di ko siya nakita lumabas ng room tuwing uwian magtitingin tingin ako sa paligid ko para makita lang siya na lumabas ng school or basta makita siya for one last time of the day.<br><br>On present situation naging kagroup ng ilang beses naging magkatabi at conversation kaming dalwa, para sakin normal na yung sudden eye contact namin (nag eye contact na ng maraming beses jusko) dahil maaaring lutang din siya at nagkataon na nakatingin siga sa way ko. Masaya lang ako dahil sa kanya at nagiging friend ko na siya, na-achieve ko na yung original goal ko talaga pero di naman maiwasan na unting mag assume at magselos kahit walang label din minsan haha

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• VI

  @vin.81 · 2 years ago

  I fell in love with my friend. We were classmates, he and I are the complete opposite. He&apos;s the athletic and popular guy, while I was the introverted quiet kid who was only ever needed because he&apos;s smart. And at the beginning, I knew that was exactly why he talked to me in the first place. I was willing to help, and he needed it, and from there everything started. As time went on, though, something between us changed. We started genuinely talking, breaking down any of my wariness. His touches went from playful to fond, he hung out with me more outside school, and he started frequently making sure I was okay when I didn&apos;t talk (which is most of the time anyway but that&apos;s beside the point).<br><br>I was falling for him in record time. He was insufferable, loud, clingy, but kind, actually really smart, and he&apos;s vulnerable and open around people he trusts (around me). I was falling, but it wasn&apos;t like that for him. That&apos;s what I told myself everyday. He was straight, I could never have a chance. But there are so many times where he makes it hard for me to remember that, like that one time he, out of nowhere, took my hand on our way home from hanging out in our local mcdo that was near our school. Or that time he cheered me up when most of our friends were scared of me after I snapped and yelled at class because of stress. Or his constant need to *touch*. And the nicknames, god, the nicknames. <br><br>It&apos;s been a year now, and we&apos;re still friends. We&apos;re both now in senior high, him being in STEM while I chose HUMSS in the same school. I kept telling myself I&apos;ll distance myself a little to try and fall out of love, but every time I try, he seems to notice and pulls me back towards him with his damn smile and the way he holds and looks at me. It&apos;s the classic &quot;queer guy falls for the straight jock&quot;, and honestly, it&apos;s really painful, but I&apos;m content with pining over him in secret.

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