What Can I Do If I Can’t Remember My Childhood?

Comments · 202

• JE

  @jessielbrown2154 · 4 years ago

  I literally have no memories of my childhood, it’s really scary, it’s as if they are locked away and I can’t access them - but I have no trauma, my parents seem normal - no abuse etc, I don’t understand.

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• RO

  @Rose_Ou · 4 years ago (edited)

  My therapist's first question was 'what good memories do you have of the time spent with your parents?'. I sat for 10 minutes thinking but couldn't give any. She said that people nornally  remember good times but supresse bad memories and that if I couldn't remember any good moments it means it must have been really bad. It was. I supressed almost all of my childhood and I have huge memory gaps from my past in general. This is one of my protective mechanisms in order to stay sane.

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• AD

  @AdorkableHarleyFairy · 4 years ago (edited)

  I'm the only one in my family who does remember, and I remember it all. My family now thinks I'm lying, so my response was, "Said the family who doesn't remember, to the girl who never forgot..."

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• 11

  @11GypsySoul · 2 years ago

  I journaled.  It helped slowly.  I changed to writing in colored pencils, pens, crayons, markers.  I turned the page on the diagonal to write.  I switched to unlined paper.  These were suggested to me by a therapist.  It worked much faster.  I wrote about the details of the curtains in the room (non threatening details of the experience to let myself back into the room).  The details of the curtains … moved to details of wall paint… moved to ppl in the room… moved to opening the full memory up from a less threatening, objective observer memory.  Good luck those of you here.  It was never your fault.  I have realized that no one has hurt me in this life as much as I have… let’s be understanding with those inner children who went through these things.

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• IS

  @isabels2973 · 4 years ago

  I was in the psyche ward 3 times as a young teenager. No one ever questioned my childhood or any possible abuse. I even told them I do not want my dad there or visiting me.

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• IT

  @itscoolerthatway · 2 years ago

  I remember bits and pieces but mostly the bad stuff ...

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• TH

  @thebeigesheep6132 · 4 years ago

  My first memory is 4 and it was rooted in racism. I feel like a lot of times we forget racism can cause people trauma. It's seen as an inconvenience instead of trauma.

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• DA

  @DayaMcCarthy · 2 years ago

  I want to remember cause i feel uncomfortable around a certain family member, i feel like something happened but i can remember. I don't feel safe

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• C0

  @C0NM4N0V · 3 years ago (edited)

  I noticed I had a friend as a child, but I do not remember what she looks like, sounds like, or anything, not even her name, all I know is that I had a friend years ago, I also feel I miss her.

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• AR

  @arbez101 · 4 years ago

  This is not a sob story. Just the facts. My mom abused alcohol even while I was in her uterus. I was born with a cleft lip. I had lip surgery before leaving the hospital, I am told. I&apos;m the 2nd oldest of 4 brothers. I&apos;m 60 now, and began working on myself around the age of 28, when I went into inpatient alcohol and other addictions rehab. I&apos;ve been clean and sober ever since. Working on myself, self discovery has been an on and off affair. Around 15 years ago I checked myself into a therapist for anger management therapy, during which I was &quot;hypnotized&quot; was it were, and regressed as far back as I could go. I recalled a disturbing memory of a traumatic event that occurred sometime between my 7th and 10th year. My mom wanted me to shut my mouth, to be quiet. I don&apos;t remember why? But it seems to me I was crying or complaining over something. She stuffed a handkerchief in my mouth and ordered me to sit on the floor in a corner of our living room. That&apos;s still a doozy of a memory for me to integrate. I&apos;m the only one of my brothers who she physically hurt. I think because I was very strong minded, and insubordinate even at a young age. Another memory, around the same era, but later, probably closer to 10 years old for sure, she caused me to stumble down a step near the back door of our house, from the inside. My head fell into the glass on the door. The glass broke and I had a cut on my head for which I had to be taken to emergency. It wasn&apos;t too ban really. I got a few stitches. Even though my mom made it clear to my brothers and I, that we were worthless and we don&apos;t appreciate anything, we always tried to love her as best we knew how. Sometime around the same era, between my age of 5 to 8 I would say, my mom left us boys and my dad. As it turned out she was living with another man somewhere else in our town. The way I remember it was my dad packed me and my brothers in the car and drove us to a house where my mom was supposed to be. I guess my dad knew that mom wasn&apos;t going to see or talk to him, so he had me and my 1 year older brother go to the door of the home and ask for my mom, and if she came to the door we were to ask her to please come home. I don&apos;t recall if she came to the door or not, it seems like she did, but I&apos;m not sure. But I remember somebody did, so we got to at least give her the message.<br>Remember I said not a sob story. Just the facts as I remember. I&apos;m getting back into mindfulness meditation AND shadow work these days. I have no fear of what I might see or realize, and I&apos;ve come to accept (for myself) that there are some things which can perhaps be remembered or examined, but not changed, and healing then, simply means accepting. And that&apos;s Ok.

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• PO

  @porvoonosho · 3 years ago

  I had a loving home, two sisters and parents together. I have lot of photos of doing things together with my parents and getting every toy I ever wanted. But I remember NOTHING. I have maybe a total of 30-50 memories from my childhood from 3 to 16. I&apos;m now 42.

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• PO

  @pod9363 · 3 years ago

  I find that the more I consciously think about the memories from childhood I do have, the more other memories start to crop up.

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