Why the Bedroom Exposes Avoidant Attachment (99% of the Time)

Comments · 219

• UN

  @understandablepodcast · 2 months ago · pinned

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• CH

  @charjackson- · 2 months ago

  My avoidant ex has addiction to porn. Sex did stop at the end all together. But when when had it would be mechanical. We been broke up for 2 months now. He called yesterday confessing his love and how he know he will never find a woman like me ever again. He said I’m rare. But of course not trying to repair. That was the second time he called me this week after he had been shut down and ignoring me. He recognized I’m detached and no longer chasing him. I don’t care anymore. I’m healing from someone I never thought I would have to heal from

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• LA

  @lauraml60 · 1 month ago (edited)

  Spot on! He told me he had zero sex drive but I think it&apos;s not about libido as he told me he was addicted to porn. We used to have a very vibrant sex life.

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• ME

  @Memsen8700 · 1 month ago

  I did all the wrong things before. She was the avoidant. No talks or sex for years. I became a shell of myself

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• LI

  @Liiiiiiiaaaa · 1 month ago

  This breaks my heart😢 I went through this!!! Felt so unhappy and invisible to him

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• SS

  @ssabrinaahmed · 2 months ago

  Affair-prone and 🌽 watching person who is turned on by others but is mechanical and disinterested with you. How devastating and horrific. The lack of emotional and physical intimacy.

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• ME

  @memorynelson7441 · 2 months ago

  They don’t have communication skills then you get caught up in this as well. Most pointless relationship if you ask me

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• E.

  @e.l.l.y. · 2 months ago (edited)

  Been there, through the whole nine yards and back. I tried to be patient, even though it felt horrible to suppress my needs for so many years. I tried to understand him and what we could do to make things work again… and got it thanked by finding out he’s been having an affair with his neighbor for years. &nbsp;<br><br>I feel utterly stupid about having stayed loyal with this idiot for so many years.

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• AL

  @alteredcatscyprus · 1 month ago

  I believe this is true and that’s why the worst advice is the advice you usually get which is not to be straight up with an avoidant. Be straight up. Don’t walk on eggshells. Don’t let anybody make you walk on eggshells.. Be yourself say what you mean, see what you see. Take the risk it’s worth it. you’ll be at peace being true to yourself even if they don’t like it. It’s a win-win for you. But don’t let anybody put you in chains or in a box.

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• EX

  @ExFilesUnsealed · 1 month ago

  There’s a book called The Hidden Rules of Attachment by Maya Ellison, and it talks about the patterns that quietly control who pulls away, who chases, and who slowly disappears in a relationship. It’s not the usual advice. It feels different.

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• SS

  @ssabrinaahmed · 2 months ago

  So they can’t be present emotionally nor physically? So what are they good for? Sorry but I don’t see the benefit in a relationship like that. It’s draining in every sense of the word.

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• ME

  @melisalandeteduran8990 · 2 months ago

  I was afraid to listen to this because of the experiences i had in my marriage, but this clarifies basically everything that i had to go through and makes me feel less bad about that awful experience

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