Talking Gay Loneliness | The Queerness Diaries

Comments · 317

• ZE

  @zeroling7690 · 1 year ago

  I'm gay, and physically disabled. I know how you feel!!

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• JU

  @JudiH-ig6uu · 1 year ago

  You popped up and I felt the need to listen to your story and then comment. I am a straight 73 year old woman. My younger son was 33 years old when he had a massive heart attack and died. He was openly gay and as his parent, I worried about him. But mostly I felt sad that he died never finding a loving partner. He always acted like it was okay, but I always wondered how he really felt. I think you have given me insight through your video. Thank you and my best to you.

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• UP

  @uptoncriddington6939 · 1 year ago

  Friendship takes work from both sides. When it’s genuine it becomes play, not work.

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• BR

  @bruceharrottassociates3854 · 1 year ago

  I am a 73-year-old gay man, single for years, and I so relate to your thoughts and feelings. What I have realized is that my loneliness will never be removed by connections with others, only through a deeper connection with myself and my higher power (or God if you prefer).

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• CO

  @coupleofbeers31 · 1 year ago

  I am a gay man living in Phoenix AZ and can totally relate. It's exactly the same deal here. I have been taking a break from the scene now for the last few months. It becomes very toxic and nasty in those places. As a man of 46 now, I face discrimination due to my age and also I don't have a high-paying job or nice car or fancy place so people are also very judgmental about that. I am really looking to meet a good man with whom I can share my life but it's like looking for a grain of salt in a haystack it seems. I am now trying dating apps since the bars and clubs didn't work out but they are also super toxic and there are even scammers in those apps so you have to be careful. I don't know. I have also lived in other large US cities and it's the same deal. Most gay men are super shallow and judgmental. What's more is that I am masculine and have gotten a lot of criticism for it. I've had men tell me to stop faking it and to start to act "gay". What a joke. Gay men come in all shapes, sizes, and personalities. I also am so tired of them pushing a very close-minded liberal agenda, it's insane. Anyhoo, I totally understand also where you are coming from in terms of friendships. I have few friends but most of the time I am the "initiator". I am the one suggesting we go somewhere, like maybe a concert or play, and most of the time they are unavailable. Let's hope for the best.

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• GR

  @GraceNcube · 1 year ago (edited)

  Lesbian here. And AGREED! Super relatable. One theory- many people are very comfortable staying home with their Netflix, Instagram and ordering food delivery to their door. It can be hard to even get plans going. And even if the plans are in the schedule, sometimes people cancel or don’t follow through. I’ve noticed it a lot more since about 2020. And dating apps?? They’ve changed as well. I’ve found the most luck just getting involved with queer community events. Being there on the ground floor. And becoming regular at local gay spots. Coming across more familiar faces. It’s harder these days to connect with people in person. But there are still a few of us out there who value it:) it’s definitely hard to cope with the shift. Plus with the economy people have more financial strain and are working more and prefer to just keep their energy to themselves. It’s not ez I know. Thanks for posting this!!! New subscriber here :)

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• H0

  @h0ll9w · 1 year ago

  i’m a straight 26 yo male from La. I applaud you and i choke up as i walk alone listening to someone explain a story i live.<br>i hope you’re finding somethin.

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• MO

  @MostlyLoveOfMusic · 1 year ago

  With every passing year, more people will reject us and ignore us - this is why youth was a precious time that is quickly lost

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• JA

  @jameshopkins7507 · 1 year ago

  You have expressed my experience completely. For many long years I chased after people, thinking that I was a greater part of their lives than I actually was. If I kept up the contact, there was contact, if not, no one would think of sending me a text, email or call. So, I finally decided to stop chasing after people. I too, have three good but geographically distant friends. They are great and we zoom from time to time. Essentially, I feel alone and lonely most of the time, but as I tell myself now, everyone knows where I am and how to get in touch with me and if I ever crossed their minds, they could drop me a line every now and then. Sadly, this includes family as well. Sometimes, one has to come to enjoy one&apos;s own company.

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• PA

  @patriciabuxareoprego6567 · 2 years ago

  I love this sweetie. You are an open book and one of the reasons why I conncet so well with you is because everything you say makes so much sense. Loneliness is one of the biggest issues nowadays and internet is not helping.

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• SA

  @saharkhalili5303 · 1 year ago

  You&apos;re saying the same words I would say, and I think we all felt similar waves of emotions over the last disruptive years. I have become majorly isolated, and tired. Letting go of friends and sad at how easy that is. You are very authentic and honest here without being bitter, which means you still have capacity for hope. 💕

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• CA

  @CamrnCrz · 2 years ago

  The opening two minutes could not have described my life any better.

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