How to Overcome Performance Anxiety and Speak with Confidence in Any High-Stakes Situation

Have you ever felt completely prepared for a presentation, only to have your confidence evaporate the moment you step up to speak? If so, you’re not alone. In this episode of Speaking with Confidence, we're tackling one of the most common and most frustrating experiences for anyone who speaks, performs, or competes in front of others: performance anxiety. I'm Tim Newman, a recovering college professor turned communication coach, and today I’m joined by Dr. David Fish, a PhD in ethnomusicology, professional musician, and a leading authority on performance anxiety and mindfulness. David not only shared the stage with legendary names like Ella Fitzgerald and Little Richard, but he also had his own unforgettable “freeze” moment while performing with Sonny and Cher, a moment that sparked a lifelong quest to understand what really happens when nerves take over. In our conversation, David explains the difference between confidence and performance anxiety, and why so many talented professionals, whether they’re in the spotlight or the boardroom, find their skills deserted at the crucial moment. We unpack the myths around just “thinking positive” or “calming down,” and dig into why these strategies often fall short when your internal bodyguard (the amygdala) decides there’s a threat and floods your system with adrenaline. Here’s what we covered in this episode: The difference between confidence and performance anxiety, and how even seasoned professionals can be caught off guard by nerves Why common advice like “calm down” or “think positive” doesn’t work against adrenaline-fueled anxiety The three factors that trigger performance anxiety, no matter your field or experience level How to accept, not fight, your nervousness and why that leads to better performance The importance of preparation, rituals, and controlling your environment (plus what to do when things don’t go as planned) The role of mindful focus (“only go straight, don’t know”) in overcoming distractions and outside judgments How to distinguish between excitement and anxiety, and why channeling energy the right way matters The idea that public speaking is a performance, and why embracing that doesn’t mean being inauthentic The value of bringing your core beliefs and values to the moment, especially when the stakes are high Practical strategies for shifting self-talk and grounding yourself before you step up to speak If you’ve ever wondered why your nerves sometimes get the best of you, or you’re searching for practical, compassionate tools to step into the spotlight with greater confidence, this episode offers wisdom, stories, and actionable guidance you can use right away. As always, remember: you’re not broken; performance anxiety is a perfectly human response. Accept it, focus on what matters, and keep showing up with courage. Timestamps: 00:00 Dealing with performance anxiety 05:08 Shared experiences in sports and music 07:36 Sonny and Cher performance anecdotes 12:31 Dealing with success and expectations 15:41 Handling performance anxiety 16:36 Experiencing performance anxiety 23:00 Visiting Berkeley Zen center 25:22 Dealing with stage fright 27:56 Managing adrenaline for performance 33:04 Handling high-stakes situations 35:20 Importance of visualization and fundamentals 38:01 Dealing with performance anxiety 42:27 Interviewing boring golf winners 45:34 Overcoming performance anxiety 49:43 Discussing podcast setup and courses 50:46 Wrapping up with David's interview