„Ich will dich, aber…“ – warum du Beziehungen sabotierst, die gut laufen könnten | Stefanie Stahl

Stefanie Stahl, psychologist, psychotherapist, and bestselling author, explains why fear of commitment shapes so many relationships—and why we often both seek and fear intimacy. This episode explores the typical dynamics of fear of commitment: the shift between intense passion and sudden withdrawal, the feeling of confinement, the fear of loss, and the unconscious childhood imprints that continue to influence us today. Stefanie shows how these patterns develop, why they have nothing to do with a lack of love, and what steps can help to recognize, understand, and overcome fear of commitment. Drawing on her own experiences and decades of practice, she makes it clear: everyone is capable of relationships once they begin to see through their old patterns. This episode is for anyone who repeatedly finds themselves in on-again, off-again relationships, struggles with intimacy, or wonders why they sabotage relationships that could actually be going well. Stefanie shows how these patterns develop, why they have nothing to do with a lack of love, and what steps can help to recognize, understand, and overcome fear of commitment. 00:00:00 – Intro 00:02:46 – What attachment anxiety really means – more than just fear of intimacy 00:04:24 – Why Stefanie has been intensively studying attachment anxiety for years 00:08:36 – Stefanie's personal experience with a partner with attachment anxiety 00:12:18 – “Weakness Zoom” vs. “Me” – how attachment anxiety distorts your perspective 00:16:21 – Where attachment anxiety comes from – childhood, imprinting, and old wounds 00:26:57 – Léon's own story with attachment anxiety 00:34:33 – Self-esteem and attachment anxiety – why the two are inextricably linked 00:43:55 – The different attachment styles – and how they influence relationships 00:50:02 – First steps: What you can do if you or your partner have attachment anxiety Recognize 00:52:55 – Why anger can suppress all feelings – and make intimacy impossible 00:57:38 – Communication in relationships – why it's crucial for those with attachment anxiety 00:59:06 – Typical beliefs of people with attachment anxiety 01:00:20 – Why you hardly stand a chance if your partner doesn't recognize their anxiety 01:09:59 – How Stefanie works with people with attachment anxiety in therapy 01:12:58 – Attachment anxiety as a social phenomenon 01:18:52 – What can help us become a society with secure attachment 01:20:00 – The question from the last guest Léon: YouTube: @leonhei Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3mic5IH... Apple Podcast: https://apple.co/40wf2TN Coaching: https://www.leonheimann.de/coaching Stefanie: Book "Everyone Is Capable of Relationships": https://amzn.to/4glaAO5 * Website: https://www.stefaniestahl.de/ YouTube: @stefaniestahlde My goal is to provide you with knowledge and food for thought that will help you actively embrace change. *Note: Affiliate link. If you purchase through this link, you support my channel – the price remains the same for you.