How the Way You Look at Someone Changes Who They Become | David Brooks
209K views · Jul 14, 2026 · Education
Comments · 454
@WhatsRightWhatsLeft-id1oq · 2 months ago
I believe there is one word to describe this, and I am not religious, but it is GRACE
324
@emcc187 · 2 months ago
This is important, but please be discerning. There are many, many manipulative and abusive people out there who won't change no matter how you look at them.
191
@OmegaGrace8 · 2 months ago
Attention and listening is true love.
172
@kipling1957 · 2 months ago
“Attention is a moral act.” Iain McGilchrist, The Matter with Things.
118
@dealightful82 · 2 months ago
If you replace the word ‘attention’ with ‘connection’ your perspective will change. <br>When people misbehave and ‘seek attention’ they actually crave connection they never were offered in their childhood.
269
@fern10011 · 2 months ago
This headline overemphasizes the power of the listener. You don’t cause the person to become anything. You find out who they are by dropping your arrogance.
147
@loveschile7339 · 2 months ago
Ive discovered that this is why I attract ppl who become obssessed with me. Its because when ppl talk to me I give them my undivided attention and one day I realized that, people just arent used to that. I just dont know how to be rude and NOT listen! Sone golks dont even tealize thats why they keep talking to me. The downside for them is that later, I think they feel guilty about talking and telling me so much.
106
@artsie8282 · 2 months ago
I love this. I do this at times - I listen intently and give eye contact. I will do this much more often. Folks deserve it. There are 7 people who do this to me regularly - 4 friends, 3 relatives (best husband ever). They are cherished by me.
82
@MatthewClark-u4g · 1 month ago
The last times my mom went to confession the priest poured out his own troubles...she is that kind of soul.
5
@ramyhuber8392 · 1 month ago
Waking up to one's own inherent narcissism is very helpful.
6
@joesyogafitness6085 · 3 weeks ago
I've incorporated giving attention and receiving attention throughout the week with people in my life. Everything about my life is better for it.
1
@Da_Xman · 2 months ago
Essentially, giving others caring attention is simply sincerity, which might be called "the greatest attribute"; without sincerity, there's only lies.
19
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