Florida Man Gets Caught "Violently" Jerking It In Police Station

Comments · 2K

• BU

  @BunnyBee2001 · 10 months ago

  This man does NOT look 25. Maybe 25 seconds away from being 40

  2K

• WH

  @wh5333 · 10 months ago

  People can’t even have hobbies anymore.

  952

• TH

  @TheRavioli81 · 9 months ago

  Legend has it he represented himself in court because he believed he could get himself off...

  782

• VI

  @vis4479 · 10 months ago

  Daaang, Dane dressed up sharp for this man's funeral

  275

• LA

  @ladyyo727 · 10 months ago

  Dude wore a shirt the same color as the walls thinking he could blend in. He must have been thinking, "If Bear chokes a chicken in the police station and no one is around to see it, did it really even happen?"

  176

• CL

  @clintm4629 · 10 months ago

  he's got a rock-solid alibi

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• FA

  @fartboxdemon · 10 months ago

  Any time "Florida" is in the headline, you know you need gloves and a prayer.

  978

• SM

  @smoldragon339 · 10 months ago

  Don't you hate it when you have sleep paralysis, which as we all know, causes you to move around a bunch in your sleep because that's totally what "paralysis" means?

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• MA

  @maggiereid2865 · 10 months ago

  Get this hardened criminal 😂

  74

• SO

  @SOTFarchive · 9 months ago

  I used to take prisoner’s xrays, and one time the prisoner patient was a known “chronic masturbator”. He needed the xray cuz his cell mate had beat him up because of it. <br>And man! 😂 I have never seen the cops so tense!!! The look of fear they gave eachother when i told them they had to remove his cuffs from behind his back to be able to do the xray! 😂😂 <br>I have literally never even seen that amount of fear from them for murderers or serial killers- but a chronic masturbator?! 😂😂<br><br>Luckily I used psychology, and did &nbsp;the &nbsp;“stern mom voice”, and nothing gross happened while i took the xrays. <br> &nbsp;But i will never forget that experience ever. 😂

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• MU

  @MusiciansRule07 · 10 months ago (edited)

  The cops were the embodiment of &quot;Eww! Brotha Eww! What&apos;s THAT???&quot; and &quot;REALLY? RIGHT IN FRONT OF SALAD???&quot;All jokes aside, this guy is not all there mentally. He needs to both face the consequences of his public Gooning and to get proper treatment so something like this doesn&apos;t happen again.

  647

• BR

  @brohen · 10 months ago

  Bruv, sleep paralysis is a wild excuse. Like does he not know what the second word mean? Lol

  675