20% Who Don't Get Better | A Therapist's Perspective (Ellen Ronka)

Comments · 348

• JO

  @Jolie_Jeune_Chose · 6 months ago

  Knowing what you're capable of and being stuck in bed is one of my biggest struggles.

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• FO

  @For71666 · 7 months ago

  Raelan, you must be tired of hearing this, but thank you. I don’t think you can fully realize how many years of pain you help people avoid. Just thank you. We love you. You are making the world a better place.

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• MA

  @marygilmour5946 · 7 months ago

  Really touched a nerve , get Ellen back soon please

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• FA

  @faith3305 · 6 months ago

  I am so very grateful for this information! I have a shame-based disorder called Avoidant Personality Disorder, caused by childhood neglect, abuse, and bullying. Most therapists unfortunately don't treat it and make me feel more ashamed. Now I am sure of what is driving my symptoms. I have been practicing self-compassion, but what really helps me is if another person has empathy towards me. It's so rare, but so healing.

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• MI

  @MicheleNealRaptureReadyUK · 7 months ago

  Wow! This is mind blowing! Finally... a video that deals with what I never knew was the root of my own 60 year struggle with life. <br>I was molested as a 3 year old and I used to hide in the wardrobe sobbing uncontrollably to try to deal with the pain. I have spent the rest of my life trying to hide the emotions of that trauma (plus many additional traumas) by doing the equivalent of &apos;hiding in the wardrobe&apos; in an effort to cope with every day life. After 60 years of walking on this tightrope, my life and my health are a daily, even hourly intense fight for survival. <br>I had no idea that the emotion of shame was the root. But now I can see that every traumatic event that has happened in my 60 years has caused the emotion of shame to intensify. <br>Thank you for shining the spotlight on this profound truth. 🙏

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• JE

  @JellyFishHeart1 · 6 months ago

  Aww and the bit where you feel like there’s opportunity to heal then I look Ellen up and realise it’s 3 k for a 12 week programme . This is the reality of our life anyone out there who is willing to help us heal at an affordable price . It’s heartbreaking and now I feel deflated . The whole point of this illness is we’re not able to work so income is a struggle . <br>A beautiful discussion I felt so much hope . &nbsp;I just feel heartbroken it’s just part of this door being shut on us .

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• PA

  @paul7cope · 7 months ago

  Hi Raelan, I very rarely comment on YouTube videos but just wanted to say thank you for this interview (and for everything you do in general). I’ve been on this journey for a long time and every word about shame being underneath things for people who haven’t healed resonated massively with me, so I’ve contacted Ellen to join her programme. Thanks again, your channel has been such a source of knowledge and comfort in recent times and I’m extremely grateful for it.

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• KA

  @karenpeters4457 · 7 months ago

  John Bradshaw, Healing the Shame That Binds You, came out in the 80’s and no one paid attention except the ACA and recovery communities. Funny how we think something is a new concept. Shame = something is wrong with me/you = I will be abandoned/rejected = if I’m abandoned I won’t survive - which is fundamental in the nervous system and true for survival. A baby/child needs a village to survive. &nbsp;Defective animals and infants in some cultures &nbsp;are left &nbsp;behind to perish.

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• DA

  @davinalakeman1753 · 7 months ago

  I am sitting in Mexico on a five week “holiday” to try and decompress and also jump into MAJOR “exposure” to try and engage in life after years of agoraphobic anxiety and I am crying. This is it. This is the main issue for me. Thank you so much, I don’t know what to do next but at least I don’t feel so alone. ♥️

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• TO

  @Tortise02 · 1 day ago

  For me, the lightbulb moment her was Raelan saying &quot;A good person wouldn&apos;t make someone else upset&quot;. My Nan was my primary caregiver as a child. She was very kind and loving, but the thing I remember her saying (a lot!) was &apos;Be a good girl&apos;. It was a hard thing for someone of 66 to look after a small child, I don&apos;t blame her, but I WAS a good child - I tried SO hard to be good. It made me into a chameleon, always trying to be what other people want and being afraid of them not loving me as I am. And from my early 20s, I&apos;ve suffered with chronic symptoms. I&apos;m 66 myself, now, but have great hope of recovery. Thank you!

• ME

  @Melted_Butter · 7 months ago

  I knew it was shame before I even pressed play. Toxic shame is tough to shift tho.

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• 8D

  @8draupadi · 6 months ago

  Her program is 3000. Please, how can we afford such a huge amount and dedicate ourselves to a non-refundable program with Chronic Fatigue? When we are struggling for survival and cannot earn really??? Alone...?? Why is there no real help, just business???

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